04 December 2015


Dear Gideon,
Tomorrow you turn three.  I struggle to comprehend how we got here.  How the tiny, dark-haired baby boy that I begged God for, grew so swiftly into a rambunctious three year old.  It feels like time is playing a cruel trick.  Where did my baby go?

There is no baby in you anymore.  As you often remind me, you're a big boy.  So big. So handsome. I watched you intently while we played with PlayDoh the other day.  I'm jealous of your eyelashes.  It sounds strange, but I'm not the first to say it.  You have your dad's eyebrows and I love watching them furrow and exaggerate on your face as your emotions change.  You are charismatic to say the least.  That dark newborn hair, turned to bright blonde and is now fading back to dark.  Your baby curls have disappeared leaving a mass of thick waves that often stick straight out after a night of sweaty sleep.  You get so hot at night regardless of the temperature.

This year you became a big brother.  We didn't know how you would handle the change.  To say you exceeded our expectations is an understatement.  You are a champion big brother.  So gentle and sweet.  You laugh and play and instruct Nolan.  You give him kisses and hugs.  The best is when you hear him wake up from his nap.  You burst into his room with a "Heeeyyy, buddy!" climbing in to his crib and bringing the best belly laughs out of our stoic baby.  Your bond is something I cherish and look forward to watching grow.

Oh G.  I love you.  You are loud, energetic, goofy, frustrating as anything, handsome, sweet.  You come out of your room each morning with a hearty "goood morning!" making it impossible for me to be grouchy.  I love how exciting everything is to you.  Going to movies or games is your favorite. You talk about it for weeks afterward and are always so grateful for these experiences.  You adore your friends and despite being two and having issues with sharing, your kindness and affection towards them is evident.

I'll always remember this time in your life as the "superhero time."  Obsessed is an understatement.  You love them.  You could (and do) eat oatmeal everyday.  I laugh at your five course breakfast.  I'm not sure how I'll feed you all in later years!  You love cars, PlayDoh, helping me "make" in the kitchen.  You light up when we have breakfast for dinner and could probably recite every Curious George episode word for word.  You always request the race car cart at Publix, followed by a request for a sprinkle cookie from the bakery where you always tell the worker "thank you."  You are a little OCD about things just like me.  You are you, that's for sure!

Thank you for your bear hugs, smooshed mouth kisses and sweet words like "You're beautiful."  Ah, it melts me.  Thank you for pushing me to be a better me and a better mama.  I'm sad and excited that you are growing.  It's hard knowing you will never be that little baby again, but also exciting to watch the boy you are becoming.

I love you more than M&M's.


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